…for me to attend my first Tridentine Mass. I’ve been thinking about it for a long time. But now I just feel the time is right. Just as I felt on 12 May 2007 that the time was right to join the Lay Dominicans.
I like it when things happen this way, nicely, without any trauma or drama. The phrase I’ve always used for it is “a gravity on my soul.” A gentle yet irresistible drawing toward something. Just when the time is right. And all I have to do is allow it; I learned long ago that fighting it is futile and usually painful. The trauma and drama start up when you fight the gentle gravity on your soul.
Of course, if you’re being gently pulled toward something evil, then you fight! The devil is smart and capable of great subtlety. He tries to imitate the gentle, holy gravity God exerts on us. He tries to imitate the still small voice, the little whispering sound. And we are all too willing to accept it. This is why it is so important to stand by the Church’s teachings and form your conscience in her light. Otherwise, you’ll be all out to sea. You might end up fighting God instead of fighting the devil as you should–that is not a good situation to be in, and believe me, you can’t win in it.
But I digress.
I’ve also been thinking about getting myself a head-covering of some kind. I don’t think the lacy veils are my style. They were my style back in my goth days. But then, I wore them out on the town, not to church. I wore them to be eye-catching, not humble. I don’t have anything against other ladies wearing lacy veils. They just have a different “meaning” in my life, and one that doesn’t really belong at Mass.
So, I’m thinking that either a simple hat or maybe a plain, solid scarf will work better for me.
Does anybody have any words of advice–either about the Tridentine Mass or about the head-covering? Words of encouragement will be appreciated also. :)
I think I’m going to try to go this weekend, with or without a head-covering. Unless somebody tells me that it would be incredibly gauche or inappropriate to go without a head-covering.
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11 February 2009 at 2:08 PM
VA
I wear different kinds of mini-scarf-thingies of which one is almost like a mantilla (that’s my under-cover one). Many women at our “local” TLM don’t wear a headcovering, but I think it might be different in the States.
Your “not my style” reasoning is pretty good :)
It helps if you can find someone to go with you, who is a bit more familiar with the extraordinary form. In any case, there should be booklets explaining everything. And it’s not as different from the ordinary rite as you might think – the main thing is that the Offertory takes much longer. Oh, and it doesn’t seem like the prayers are addressed to you.
11 February 2009 at 2:23 PM
Warren
My first time attending a Latin Mass, I was surprised by the silent recitation of the words of consecration, and in fact, a good bit of the central part of the mass will require that you follow along carefully in the missal. Doing this in a proper missal, because there are no misalletes, requires you get used to page flipping, but you’re an old hand with the Liturgy of the Hours, and you already know the Colorful Ribbons Are Your Friend.
I recommend you absolutely get a Latin Missal but not until after you attend your first latin mass. That way you can ask people there which one they recommend.
The very best way to attend a TLM is to go with someone who can help you through the missal and orient you.
You can print out the relevant bits from the proper of seasons, the ordinary, and so on, from here:
http://mysite.verizon.net/missale/
The most important part to focus on for your first mass is the ordinary of the mass:
http://mysite.verizon.net/missale/order.html
The priest will approach the altar and say the prayers at the foot of the altar (Psalm 42). You will find almost everything in the older liturgies is a lot like the Liturgy of the Hours. You are travelling into a series of liturgies nestled in layers around each other, like those russian stacking dolls (Petruska dolls). This is why it says “Mass of the catechumens” in the ordinary. This is one “layer” in the trifle-cake of the ordinary of the Mass.
Warren
11 February 2009 at 2:25 PM
Warren
The link I sent you is a very very old copy. I think my missal omits little details like this one, on purpose:
“[The Missal is transferred to the other side of the altar to symbolize that the divine favor was taken away from the unfaithful Jews and given to the Gentiles.]”
Warren
11 February 2009 at 2:28 PM
Warren
Oh one more bit of advice. You will most likely be expected to receive Communion on the Tongue, and communion on the hand is not acceptable to most traditional latin mass priests, so papal indult or not, do what others do. The veil is not a big issue at most latin masses, except at SSPX chapels, which I assume you would NOT be attending mass at, since I assume you would only ever attend a valid licit Mass in the Extraordinary Form, and not a schmismatic event. The schismatics are big on veils, but not so big on obedience and submission to the sacred magisterium of the Church, including the teaching of the Second Vatican Council. (grin)
Sorry for being so over-board in my comments. I’m excited you’re going to try it.
11 February 2009 at 3:53 PM
Practicing Catholic
VA & Warren: Thanks so much for the wealth of information! I’m getting even more excited now!
Warren, no worries about me turning schismatic–I’ve gone through so much to get back in line with the Church united with Rome, I won’t be messing that up anytime… well, EVER.
I am already in the habit of receiving communion on the tongue, and while kneeling too (my parish church actually still has altar rails!) so I think I’m good to go as far as Communion is concerned. I think it will be nice to receive Communion from a minister who is actually used to, and comfortable with, giving it on the tongue!
11 February 2009 at 5:32 PM
3secondfish
Re: headcoverings . . .
There’s a lot more variety than you’d think, and I’ve seen all these at my parish. If you don’t want to do lace, sheer fabrics work as well as solids. (Don’t miss the fun of your chapel veil being a blanket fort for just you and God!) Kerchiefs are fine, particularly in a nice feminine fabric. I’ve seen hats that would be suitable for meeting the Queen of England, as well as the King of the Universe, and soft little crocheted caps. Even something as subtle as a narrow hairband is acceptable; the woman’s hair is often in an updo for this, making it doubly elegant. It’s all good. :)
I keep a veil in my purse all the time. I don’t think I’d *not* go to Mass uncovered, but I would feel awkward and distracted. :P It’s part of the whole “church clothes” thing now. If I had any choice, I would no sooner go to Mass uncovered, than I would go in pajamas. :P
11 February 2009 at 6:04 PM
erica
you go, girl, about the headcovering(s)! that’s something i’ve been wrestling with myself for a bit…i use a larger headscarf (about 2x hanky size) that has paislys (paislies? sometimes spelling is not my forte) on it. there are some excellent articles i’ve read on other blogs about veiling; i could track down some links and send them your way if you’d like.
11 February 2009 at 11:33 PM
Pete
Like you, I’ve been thinking about going to a mass in the extraordinary form for some time. You have encouraged me to explore this option more earnestly, and I appreciate the tips from the other commentators, too. I think part of what has held me back is thinking I will feel lost. (It might be good for me to be able to empathize with non-Catholics who attend a Catholic mass in the ordinary form!). I don’t know if my interest is more out of curiosity, or a desire to connect with the long history of the mass and the Church. I love Latin, although my understanding of it is limited; it’s been quite a while since I took it in school. There is a parish not far from us that also has mass in the ordinary form in Latin. I think I’d like to go to that, too.
11 February 2009 at 11:35 PM
Practicing Catholic
3secondfish and Erica: Thanks for the suggestions and encouragement re: head-covering. I think I shall have a good time finding and choosing one! I’m sure I’ll know it when I see it. :)
11 February 2009 at 11:46 PM
Practicing Catholic
Pete: It’s great that you too are thinking about the EF. I think my interest comes both from curiosity and a desire to connect with our great patrimony. The EF is part of our inheritance, our treasury, as Catholics.
I also desire a greater encounter with mystery… something apart from the world. The Mass gives us that in general, but I wonder if the EF liturgy may draw me even more deeply into the mystery and the sacredness of the Mass.
Overall, I’ve just heard so many wonderful things about the EF. I want to see what it’s all about!
12 February 2009 at 1:53 AM
susie
Our first TLM was in Dallas, 3 years ago. We didn’t know we were going to one, but it was a Sat morning and was close to our son’s residence at the time, and being daily Mass goers, that’s where we ended up. I think it was at St Thomas Aquinas. We just went to one here in Omaha last November and it was so beautiful, but the mantilla they have for the women kept falling off onto my shoulders, so I suggest bobby pins. : ) Also, one lady there said to wear the black one as the white is for younger women, which you certainly are, but I had thought it might be for widows, but she was right, the older women (like me….gulp) had black lace ones and the others had white. I don’t know if that’s the case everywhere?
I’ve also been receiving the Eucharist on my tongue, for about a year and a half. I simply can’t receive Him in my hand anymore. In fact one reason that made me know how dangerous that is, is when my dear Pastor broke placed it in my hand and it broke..and I had two very tiny pieces which I was so careful to keep until I could get back to our pew and consume them. It scared me to think that happens and some might not even know it, or see such tiny pieces. Many horrible things have happened since making communion in the hand the “norm” and it’s very sad that it ever was accepted to receive our Lord in our hands. Anyway, here’s our TLM site. God bless. http://www.latinmassomaha.org/
12 February 2009 at 2:41 AM
VA
In general, the white mantilla is for unmarried women and the black one for married. But I know of younger women at NO masses who wear the black one because it stands out less (especially if you have darker hair). It’s not a rule set in stone.
Nowadays some people might frown at women wearing a hat instead of a mantilla, but that’s neither here nor there – in some cultures the mantilla has never been common (like everywhere north of Switzerland), and women just wore hats or scarfs. That’s where 3secondfish’ observed variety comes from.
You can also try to wear trousers and claim you’re Bulgarian, but I don’t know whether that would work :)
12 February 2009 at 3:25 AM
Practicing Catholic
Susie: Yeah, if it was a Saturday morning, then it must have been at my beloved parish! :D I’m going to try very hard to be there this Saturday morning. Otherwise, I think it will have to be Sunday evening in Fort Worth.
I’ve heard about the “color code” for mantillas. I think I would be most comfortable wearing something close to the color of my hair, or else somewhat matching my clothes.
12 February 2009 at 3:30 AM
Practicing Catholic
VA: As I mentioned above, I think I’ll probably opt for a color that will blend in a little more with my hair and/or clothes.
I don’t think I could wear trousers to Mass! I hardly wear them anywhere, actually.
12 February 2009 at 3:38 AM
VA
Good! :)
I liked reading (and seeing, in our own EF parish) that there’s a huge variety in how people attend Mass – within reason, of course.
Because this revival of the EF is for a lot of people an entire “new beginning”, I’ve seen that there are groups where people have a strong idea of “how it’s supposed to be done”, which is actually different from how it used to be done. There are things done for religious reasons, and things done for cultural reasons. Elevating one to the importance of the other is an easy mistake to make if you’re not used to something (I know I do it enough).
This has absolutely nothing to do with you dipping your toe in the EF (holy) waters… it just triggered. Sorry for hijacking your comment thread. :)
14 February 2009 at 1:35 AM
racheleann
Yay! As you know I struggled with both the desire to cover my head and the fact that it might draw attention to myself. On weekdays, I usually just tie a scarf around my head like a wide headband. Its discreet and yet it is deliberate. On Sunday’s I wear a mantilla, I also have a chapel cap that I have yet to try. I got several beautiful veils at an estate sale over the summer. In the winter I usually wear hats. I only cover my head when going to extraordinary form Masses, at least in my part of the country it would be quite a sensation to walk in for a Novus Ordo Mass with a mantilla on.
I very much like my Baronius press missal. My priest has booklets made up from his Angelus Missal… I think the Angelus is slightly more detailed in its instructions, but both are excellent. Its like a little lesson every Mass because everything is explained in addition to the translations. I hope you’ll post your experience with the TLM!
Pax,
Rachele
14 February 2009 at 12:13 PM
Lexington
I just conferred with my Byzantine Rite friend, who occasionally attends Tridentine Masses. He said to anticipate kneeling far more often than in The Roman Rite Mass.
14 February 2009 at 12:51 PM
Practicing Catholic
Rachele: Thanks for your comments. I do want to have some kind of head covering. I was one of only a few young women this morning who did not have my head covered.
I would love to own a missal! Today I used some little booklets that were provided. I think I might be more comfortable with my own missal, though.
14 February 2009 at 12:52 PM
Practicing Catholic
Lexington: Yes, there was a lot of kneeling!
22 February 2009 at 1:44 AM
Mary Montgomery
Hello there, I’ve been making the rounds at these headcovering sites and I’d like to comment on you going to a Tridentine Mass. I am a member of the Pauline Family aggrogated to the Society of St. Paul. We are publishers and the only order mandated by the Vatican to make evangelization our priority. We taken a special fourth vow of fidelity to the Holy Father along with the three. We are married about to be married or widowed. We have priests nuns(three different kinds) bros and 11 Institutes in all.
All of that to say that we are a fairly conservative bunch some of us attend the Tridentine but as our Founder Blessed James Alberione had one of the very few invitations to the Council and attended every session we are all pretty much attached to the “the new” Mass which isn’t new at all. Some of our sisters are liturgical scholars and one of our Institutes the Pious Diciples make of their entire Charism /vocation the support of the liturgy. Sr.Anne at nunblog can blow you away with her knowledge and contributions to the Church. A great many of our sisters have authored books on Eucharistic Adoration worship history St. Paul. Our Roman contingency has made increadible contributions to thestudy of apostolic partnering of men and women in early church. And the first ever statement by a Pope in a ‘public’ magazine was by Pope Benedict welcoming us all to his election and spurring us on in our ministry.
I too am a returning Catholic. It has been the Novus Ordo that drew me back and I must say that for me there is something unbelievably powerful about recieving in the hand for me it is a true incarnational act of worship, Christ becoming like me that I might become like him.
A lot of our ladies have always covered their heads in Church and at our yearly retreats they go about all day with their lacy dodads on. We in the Holy Family are not permitted to have habits so as not to confuse the tourists but this subject of covering comes up in our group fequently. As the issues of submission and modesty are non issues for us the guys attitudes is usually “whatever”. Our Hungarian scholar does go on and on about the meaning of covering in other circles and being careful not leave a message that you are some one you are not. My husband is jealous and would like to waer a cover before the Blessed Sacrament. Some of our ladies wear only skirts. I am a nurse so I wear pants a lot and did so exclusively for a number of years as a way of offering sacrifice for my friend who was disfigured by Arthritis and could not wear a dress. I didn’t tell anybody so the misunderstanding was a true sacrifice. She died last Dec.
I plan to show up at this year’s Triduum in a scarf sort of thing which with any luck I will wear all day with my pantsuit, a lovely indigo number with an asymetrical hip length vest that I have crafted myself.
My whys for covering are thus:
1) I think I am being asked by God to do so for reasons I am not completely sure of.
2) I wish to be approachable to a wide variety of observant women who may be in need of my prayers and support in their lives.
3)The pretty scarves beat the heck out of the lacy do dads and they do keep my unruly hair out of my face and make my life a little simpler.
4) I am a woman on a mission to see that fundamentalism does not take over a very nice revival movement, that all women everywhere do things mindfully and with intention and follow the spirit of the thing and it’s essence rather than the letter of the law and end up being overly attached to outward signs which are shadows of the inward reality.
Anyway look us up on the web we are The Holy Family Institute or Daughters of St. Paul and you won’t go wrong attaching to our wagon. And oh our own Fr. Armorth is the Head Exorcist of the Vatican which is very funny as he looks like a Pillsbury boy!
Much love to you and I hope I didn’t overwhelm you with all of this.